Poly-Talk, with Mo' W

I attended the Democratic Rally Saturday afternoon in Raleigh, NC for John Kerry and John Edwards. This was your typical rally: hot, full of cheap candidate endorsements, o and insatiably hot. I'm not going to talk about how I saw a man turned away from the entrance because he had a shirt on that said "Bush/Cheney." I'm not going to talk about how Kerry's idea of tackling the issues is telling hundreds of stories about old people and children, or how much John Edwards gives the thumbs up. I'm not even going to comment about how incredibly, eye-poppingly, large Mrs. Edwards caboose was. I'm going to talk about what I knew least about going into the day, and how informed I feel now that the day is coming to a close. And that is Teresa Heinz Kerry. I'm just going to throw a word out that comes to mind: crazy. Now, don't get the wrong idea. I choose the word "crazy" in place of, say, "mad," because Mrs. Kerry had a sense of charisma when she spoke, as most crazy people do. "Mad" people are just sour butts all day. This charisma was like old man pee-spurts though, as it was abbreviated and "off and on" with colloquialism after tired colloquialism. It was if she was trying to burst out of her wife-mold and tell it like it is. Most intriguingly, I didn't feel her ten minute speech was about John Kerry or Edwards at all. She spoke about herself, and her opinions. These aren't the mannerisms of most first ladies or potentials I know, except for Hillary, but she's on her own nut wagon. I came away not knowing if this was a positive thing or not. I became very intrigued by this soft spoken lady and decided to look more into her. This is what I have learned:

Teresa Heinz Kerry isn't afraid to talk smack about America. She says things like "I understand why everyone hates us." She contradicts arguments her husband makes. She interrupts him during speeches, and speaks five languages at that. She has her own staff in Washington, and her own plane, "The Flying Squirrel." She's studied in South Africa, in Geneva with Kofi Annan, and in New York. Mrs. Kerry has traveled the world over, and is worth half a billion dollars, heir to the Heinz fortune, yeah that one. Holy Crap. Up until last year, she was a registered Republican. She is a loose cannon to the extreme. Here are a few quotations from conversations with people and reporters (I realize I just wrote "people and reporters." I was going to go back, but decided this was funnier, and consequently, more effective):

Campaigner~ I have ADHD, but I just want you to know I'm working my tail off for your husband,"
THK~ "But you're focused now, right?"

When an Orthodox Jew declined to shake her hand, Heinz Kerry responded "That's one way not to get diseases."

"Everybody has a prenup"

"He's Forrest Gump with an attitude." about Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania, an opponent of her first husband.

When asked about her name, why she hasn't dropped Kerry, and why she still refers to John Heinz as "My husband," she responded "Now, politically, it's going to be Teresa Heinz Kerry, but I don't give a shit, you know?"

I like her. I like her a lot. She's not afraid to be funny. And I don't mean, "We've got better hair" funny. I mean "take a jab at the side those who oppose you" funny. Take a position in an argument and stand for it. Don't lollygag and play the safest card. You might be everybody's friend, but one day everyone will catch on to your tactics. Watch out for this cat. She's got something to say. You'll see her more. It's just a matter of time.

By the way, this is a picture of her. Not bad for 65, eh Mr. Watson? Actually, she looks like my Spanish teacher, who believed that Spain was the most perfect place in the world, and there is no pollution, nor are there dog fights in Spain...but that...is a story for another day. By the way, go out and vote. O, and...go usa.